Who's In?

Pre-season football has already begun. Soon the start of the NFL season will be here. One question: Who's in?

Sources have confirmed that John Couch, last year's champion, is leaning toward a one-year hiatus. The reason given was busyness due to university courses and Halifax Mooseheads season tickets. However, one source suggests John is looking for the "Favre treatment."

If John does not join the pool this year, it would be the second straight year that the pool champion did not defend his crown. (Word is that Bert is enjoying his time away from the pool but could possibly be coaxed out of retirement if Joel issued an apology for not officially recognizing his championship title.)

There were rumors that Commissioner Joel, more elusive than Bigfoot, was in Atlantic Canada recently. This writer did not see him and is starting to wonder if he's still alive. Probably, though, we'll finally hear from Joel two minutes before kickoff.

Questions

Throughout the ages, men have wrestled with many perplexing questions. For example, "If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?"

A new question has entered into the minds of men--especially two men: Bert Kuehner and John Couch.

"If Commissioner Joel doesn't announce the winner of the Football Pool, does anyone actually win?"

For two years in a row, no one has heard from the reclusive Joel after week 17 of the NFL season. What are we to think of this? Is the Commissioner shirking his duties? Is this the real reason for Bert's retirement? Ah, questions, questions, questions.

***UPDATE***

Bert responded via his Facebook page.

"I think you've done a good job bringing much needed attention to a serious defect in the pool's management system. I don't understand why we go through the stress of competing for 17 grueling weeks only to have things end as though they didn't even transpire."

Breaking News: Bert Kuehner Retires

Bert Kuehner, the reigning football pool champion, has decided to retire. Here is Bert's official retirement statement:

After considerable thought, I've decided to "hang them up" as a pool participant. It's been a lot of fun and last year's extremely close win (I think it went down to the last game) was exciting. I want to thank all who congratulated me on the year. Bob Herrman wants in again this year, so please see that he gets needed info. Thanks. All the best to all the members.

All the best to you too, Bert. Happy retirement.

Say It Aint' So, Bert!

A semi-reliable source has claimed that current pool champion Bert Kuehner is contemplating retirement. The shocking news comes just 32 days before the start of the upcoming NFL season. Over the next few days, Bert is expected to mull over his options. Will he ride off into the sunset as champion? Or will the lure of back-to-back championships bring him back for another year? Stay tuned.

2010-2011 Champion

It was a dream football season for Bert Kuehner in 2010-2011. Not only did his Green Bay Packers win this year's Super Bowl, but he was also crowned the Football Pool Champion. (Check out the final results.) It was the first pool championship for the elder statesman of the pool.

It is believed that this is the first year that a pool member won the pool in the same year that his favorite team won the Super Bowl. There were reports that Joel Kuehner, son of Bert, was so upset about getting beat by his father that he refused to send out a year-end report.